Love is a funny thing. One moment, it’s all too good to be true. The next, it’s gone, and it was all too true to be good. Even now, I look back on all of this and revisit the could haves and should haves over and over again… and... There’s nothing I would do differently. I wish I could tell myself I would change things if I could relive the past… but I wouldn’t change a thing, even if I had that ability. Sometimes I lie to myself... and try to believe that it hurts less and less every day. In reality.. I know that it never changes deep in the core of that memory. I know it only eats away at everything that it touches. When I met him, I didn’t just tell him of the things I loved, I shared them with him. Now, they all remain as nothing more than another reminder of what I no longer have. So now, all I can do is live each day… as if it were my last. I wake up in the morning, and remind myself to breath … put my feet on the floor, and to appreciate what I have. Sooner or later… I know that I won’t have to remind myself to breath… and put my feet on the floor… and soon I’ll have returned my normal appreciation of the small things. Until then, I make it routine to prompt myself each day, and try and make the best of it all. I know that if our paths meet again, then they will. If not, then life will continue like it always has… and I will continue to live it to my fullest. I am happy to have had that little time… and if it is the end of it, I really can’t complain. It’s changed me, and made me less ignorant, and that much more of a person. I won’t erase that. If this is the end, I know that there’s someone out there... and I know that I will find them once I learn to find happiness in myself. Wonderful people do exist in this world. In fact, there are many that exist in my life as proof. Who could it be who will make the difference? The future may tell, and maybe it won't. So for now... I cherish yesterday, dream tomorrow, and live today. Now is all I really have.
exhausted
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